Ah, eggs. I see you there. Scrambled, fried, boiled, sometimes poached. Frequently depressingly overcooked and underseasoned. Did you know that after Bon Appetit did that big feature article on you, they didn’t even put your photo on the cover? No, they didn’t tell you, did they? Well just have a look. That’s right, that sticky bun that had less than a quarter page of writing dedicated to it got the top spot while you, eggs, who were third only to advertisements and shilling for celebrity chef sponsors in number of pages dedicated to you inside the magazine are relegated to some teensy text squashed onto the left-hand side, like the editors juuuuuuuust barely remembered at the last moment that your blurb was even supposed to be on the cover at all. It’s repugnant, I know.
But worry not, dear eggs, because I’ve got something to really brighten your day (and yours too, dear reader)! For you see, none other than the incomparable Vincent Price was a big fan of yours. And not just for magic! For eating too! In his book A Treasury of Great Recipes, he talks about the Javanese Omelette being one of his favorite breakfasts (and occasionally favorite dinners too). And I can do nothing but nod my head in vigorous agreement and say yes, it is so easy and so good that the Gastrognome and I now find ourselves eating it at least 2-3 times per week. Do you want to know how easy it is to make? Here–I’ll show you!
1. Finely chop a green onion.
2. Beat 3 eggs with some salt and freshly ground black pepper, 1 tsp. sambal olek (or other Southeast Asian hot sauce), and 1 tsp. water or milk.
3. Butter in pan!
4. Green onion in pan!
5. Eggs in pan!
6. Make an omelette!
7. Mmmmmmmmm.
The hardest part is really #6, since making an omelette can be pretty tricky. For the longest time my skills of omelette making were of the “yes, I always meant to just make scrambled eggs instead” variety. But this thing is so tasty that driven by the sheer desire for eating it all the time, I have managed to actually acquire a rudimentary form of proper omelette-making technique.
Yeah, that’s photographic evidence, direct from my skillet to your eyeballs.
But the eggs don’t just want you to eat with your eyes. They want you to eat with your mouth. So go make this bad boy, because whether it turns out as a perfectly folded and fluffy high-art omelette or a gritty, avant-garde scramble, the flavors will still invigorate your mind and soul with their mellow egginess, zippy kick of onion and the subtle heat of Indonesia. Yes, making your whole day better really is so easy.
Onions in the butter! I’m just mad I didn’t think of it. Although it does also remind me to try this little number.
My day is now so much better, it deserves a Happy Dance.
Damn yes. Good eggs always deserve a happy dance.
I’m going to have to try out that fried-egg-in-a-pepper setup now too. It looks delicious. (If only my own photos looked even remotely like what they actually are of, rather than half-assed Monet impersonations. If Monet had been into painting food, of course.)